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Your Mom
















Your Mom is so fat, if she was a c variable, her initialization would look like this: yourMom = (TFAT*) malloc(sizeof(YOUR_MOM)); //Stack Overflow
Your Mom is so stupid, she uploads executables in ASCII mode.
Your Mom is so stupid, she derived all three Erenfest theorems using the position space representation!!!
Your Mom has 11 fingers and 15 toes and STILL cannot count to 26!
Your Mom is so fat, when she walks she sheds vortices so large that modern synoptic-scale models include her as a factor.
Your Mom is so dumb she tried to use the pythagorean therum to solve an obtuse triangle.
Your Mom has such an unstable neutron to proton ratio, she undergoes Beta-Positive decay even when her Xenon concentration is in equilibrium!!!
Your Mom's muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irration complex numbers.
if ($your_mom eq "fat") { $slutty = "yes"; } else { $slutty = "dog"; }
Your Mom is dumb that she can't even solve a second-order non-homogeneous differential equation!
Your Mom's mass is so huge, that considering 2Mm/r^2 is not even worth considering.
The infinite series of your mom from 0 to infinity is strictly diverging.
Your Mom is so square, she's got imaginary numbers on her social security card.
Your Mom is so massive that the gravitational lensing effect is so great around her that a light beam passing within 1 AU has a radius of curvature of 6E9 meters!
Your Mom is so large that, in theory, she can see the universe dying around her.
Your Mom is so fat that you can't hear her abdominal aorta aneurysm with a duplex dopler.
Your Mom is so fat that she can theoritically eat as much as she wants and can't get any fatter or she would create a spinning vortex and engulf herself.
The mass of Your Mom at rest is approximately equal to that of a neutron star traveling at (1-(10^-1000))c.
Your Mom is so fat, that on mole of her multiplied by Avagadros number, would have her equal to the mass of an atom of an element not yet discovered. Upon discovery of this element, a new type of orbital would be required to account for the emense number
Your Mom is so dumb, she thought that time travel was possible by going faster than light, when in fact, its possible by using a quantam computer and quantam foam to jump from universe to universe in a lateral complex!!
Your Mom is so wide, the enhance-adjusted Euler manifold constant of 11th dimensional quantum tunneling through a 2 foot lead wall are less than 3.88 x 10^-596477745 per Planck!!!
Your Mom is so old that she has been traveling at a velocity just short of the speed of light all her life and she still appears to be 40 years old.
Your Mom is so fat that if one would calculate her Broglie-Wave-Length at the speed of 10^-50 m/s one would get 10^-90
The transconductance of your mom's ass varies inversely with her density.